RULES OF THE SOUTH
Grits are corn. You put butter, salt, and maybe even some pepper on them. If you want to put milk and sugar on them, then you want Cream of Wheat -- go to Kansas. That would be I-20 west.

NORTH & SOUTH
Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it.
If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this," you should stayout of the way. These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM GEORGIA IF:
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
You know what a "DAWG" is.

ATLANTA
The falling of one raindrop causes all drivers to immediately forget all traffic rules. If a single snowflake falls, the city is paralyzed for three days and it's on all the channels as a news flash every 15 minutes for a week. Overnight, all grocery stores will be sold out of milk, bread, bottled water, toilet paper, and beer.

REMEMBER WHEN
All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time?
And you didn't pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?

REARRANGED LETTERS

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters: LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

POSTED BY BILL RICKS OF SOPERTON